都听说了。突然醒来的我都听说了。不心痛了。分开了，但是突然觉得这样被你关心着很幸福。突然想到以前美好时光，笑了。想到你的笑容我笑了。想到我们怎么幸福的牵着手逛街，想到我们的吻，我也笑了。不愉快的却一点都记不起来。可能已放下，可能想挽回。但是只觉得现在的自己这样被你想着，很幸福。想再看你微笑，可能没有机会了，可惜了。虽然每天盼望，但是却觉得有缘碰到却比故意约出来的有意义多。让我们都有一点耐心，给老天一个机会，听听他的话，让他决定我们的缘分会到哪里。真的想你了。=D

Jovi, is over alr. i have done and said everything i could to stop him from caring for u n talking to u. he left u alone alr... so why dun u come out now? he will nv say he love u again... so please stop locking urself in. i feel terrible u being like tt. ur friends still need u, u noe?

doin everything n so much things, juz hoping tt jovi will come back. joy n i have been tolerating so much, n tt we also now understand why both of us r created by her. her own high expectations, n the way ppl around her treat her. her family n her responsibilities. jovi please come back soon... we will solve everything tgt ok? u cannot juz lock urself up like tt.

mission complete. now he can totally hate me, n continue with his life. hope he can forget me n live a better life.

i dun have much time left. maybe ending everything like tt would be good.

i lost. i lost the gamble. so this will be the end.

the things tt i wan to tell u... is not tt i didnt say before, n is not tt u dunno. although i wan to gamble again, but wad if i lose again? where should i go den? the next place i can go will only hurt more ppl n i will only hurt myself more... i always thought i can let u see tt u dun love her... but u nv open ur eyes n see. u dun listen n trust me to open ur eyes n see! wad else can i say, wad else can i do?! i m as hopeless as u r... maybe even more hopeless den u r.

'why?' is something i always ask. but nv i get an ans. u say u dunno, u cant choose... maybe i noe why u dunno why u cant choose. maybe becos to u, being with her is a habit. n maybe u dun like changes, so u refuse to quit tt habit, tt is my guess... but if is really juz becos u refuse changes, i think u lost someone tt gave u her whole life. even if it is true, i dun even noe whether i should be happy or sad. or maybe another reason is tt she can give u something tt i cant, den i really got nth i can win u over with.

today is the day isnt it? i wonder he will really make the effort to care for me, regardless of wad happen to make me feel that the love i have for him is worth it. heartaches everyday make me difficult to breath, stress from work juz add on to the pressure on my heart. on n off fevers, headaches and chest pain.... when will all these come to a stop? maybe when my heart stop beating, everything will stop. i really wish for my heart to stop beating. if i really end up lying on the hospital bed will u be more at ease that u dun have to care again? i have never wanted to give up... my feelings for u nv change. but becos u said u wanted to go back, so i let u go. u doubt my feelings for u. i feel disappointed. maybe u nv believe my feelings for u is true. thinking abt this make my heart go cold.... i will make good use of my last fews days to see u happy. i nv wanted to quarrel or say anything bad but u juz nv see through my thoughts and feelings... my heart missing, hoping, wishing, yearning and wanting him everyday... but he will nv see all these... becos maybe by the time he sees, i wont be around anymore...

stress!

STRESS STRESS STRESS! AND STILL STRESS!

心痛得快要死了。。。 眼泪一直流。。。一直哭的我，好累。我会好起来，但是可能又要等个五六年吧。好累。。。不能在你身边疼爱你照顾你，我觉得很遗憾。但是，千万不要被牵着鼻子走。。。

i really wonder sometimes... is tt wad u really call love? u stray so easily from her even though u 2 have been tgt for years. and u call tt love? i wonder wad is ur definition of love. i still love u n i admit tt, but hopefully it will be over soon. but i dun think u will forget the things we did tgt. wad i gave u. i didnt tell her anything we did at night at ur house. if i really told her, wad will u do? i think u will say is all the lies tt i made up and ask her not to leave u. as usual of u. u only be with me becos u have a fight with her. i m juz someone to accompany u wan u r lonely. my little rabbit.... i m still here when u need someone to accompany u. but i really truely believe, u loved me. that is the only thing u did not lie tt is why i feel so terrible for letting u go.

放了。。。都放下了。。。谢谢你给的一切。really appreciate. i wont ask u to choose anymore. i choose my own path. i wont let anyone to choose my path again. this will be a promise i made to myself.

please read this post

i really need to talk to u. i really have so many things to ask and so many things to say. juz one word from u, can save many of our things. please please please... dear god i pray, please let him read this post n understand how much i nid to talk to him... please...... i beg u.... i will meet u at tai seng station at 3.30pm on the 19th... please read this post....

is this the end?

wishing for ur happiness, no matter where u r or wad u do, may it be successful n please take care of ur health. u noe u have a weak body. treat ur gf better. u noe u love her den u shouldnt make her worry. take note of ur temper n ur tone of speaking. smile more, u look nice tt way. save up ur money, dun spend so much on games n unnecessary things. really hope u could see this post. really wanted to be with u more, but... i promise u before, i will always support ur decision. this is the one n only thing i can do for u now. i love u, please be happy.

Meaning of White Roses

White roses are the ultimate symbol of purity and innocence. It gives a wonderful feeling of positive vibes, peace and tranquility. Its pristine exterior reflects the beauty and dignified meaning that it holds. Being one of the more popular roses (apart from the Queen of Roses – the Glamorous Red Rose), the White Rose, an understated and modest beauty holds great significance and is a symbol for interesting concepts.

The white rose in myths and legends
There are plenty of myths and legends behind the white rose. As one myth has it, the first rose on Earth was a white rose, and it miraculously transformed to other hues. The pure white rose was said to have been tainted by blood, making it red; and it was also made to blush from a kiss, making it pink.

Another myth came from the Ancient Greeks. It was said that roses were originally white until one day Aphrodite the Goddess of Love and Beauty pricked herself with the thorns of a rose. The blood that dripped from her finger turned the white roses red.

These myths indicate the loss of innocence, which is the absolute opposite of what the white rose symbolizes – innocence and purity.

White roses as symbol of purity & marriage
The white rose is known as the traditional wedding flower and as such, it signifies pureness of a newly formed bond between lovers.

The tradition of brides carrying a bouquet of white roses was started in 1840, at the wedding of Queen Victoria. During this momentous occasion, white roses were used abundantly throughout the ceremony. Since then, the tradition was formed and passed on through generations. 

Brides carry a bouquet of white roses during their wedding ceremony to indicate their purity, virginity and innocence.

That being said, white roses also state the reputation of women in society – that they are clean and untainted. In Ancient Rome for example, white rose bushes were planted at the graves of deceased young women to indicate their virginity and innocence.

White roses and funerals
White roses are versatile such that they can be used to celebrate happy occasions such as weddings, as stated above, or to offer condolences at a funeral. White roses are a symbol of honour, heavenliness, spiritual love and respect; which is why they are perfect to remember loved ones who have already passed on. White roses are also a symbol of a holy and spiritual union between the departed soul and God in heaven.

White roses as a religious symbol
The white rose holds a great significance to Christians. The white represents the Virgin Mary, who has often been referred to as the Mystical Rose of Heaven. The colour white in Christianity symbolizes light, innocence, purity, glory and joy – traits which embody the virtues of Virgin Mary.

The white rose is also said to have bloomed without any thorns in Paradise before the fall of Adam and Eve. Once again, this example shows that white roses signify innocence and purity.

White roses – a symbol of secrecy and loyalty
The white rose is also known as a symbol for confidentiality and fidelity as stated in the following examples:

Back in World War II, an anti-Nazi political group was set up by a group of students in Munich. Germany. This group, which upheld the ideals of political freedom, was called “The White Rose”.

The name “The White Rose” itself says a lot about the group. It symbolizes secrecy, since it could not have possibly been formed in the open during the Nazi Regime and also loyalty because the students remained true to what they stood for to their death. Most of the members of this group were killed off upon being discovered. Thus, the white rose can also signify purity of youth.

Still on a political example, the white rose holds a great significance during the War of the Roses which took place in England . It was said that the white rose signifies death to those who betray their word. This ties the meaning of the white rose to loyalty and trust as well.

Another example of the white rose being a symbol for secrecy would be the fact that during the medieval era, talking beneath a white rose was understood to indicate the confidential content and nature of the conversation.

Also, in the 16 th century, the Pope declared that a rose be carved in confession booths to symbolize confidentiality, secrecy and privacy.

Significance of white rose buds
White rosebuds, though they are essentially white roses that have yet to blossom, carry a different meaning to full-bloomed white roses.

White rosebuds are in fact a traditional symbol of girlhood and innocence. They represent young girls who have yet to reach adolescence. These rosebuds are an underlying symbol of one being too young for love or to be loved.

Such is the interesting significance and symbolism of white roses. Interesting isn't it, how something simple yet demurely beautiful like the white rose has such a rich and fascinating background?